'How to Love' Notes by Thich Nhat Hanh

This post is series of quotes from Thich Nhat Hanh about love.  We have his book: "How to Love", and we wanted to share a couple of quotes that have helped us on many occasions along our path of love and life and relationships. When struggle happens, we simply open this book to a page to remind us of what to focus on in that moment.

There have been incredible seeds planted within us by various teachers along the way. In our daily lives so much happens every day with so many distractions, its nice to have resource tools to tap into to change the way we live (and look at life) be it if it's in bath, sitting at our desk or on the yoga mat.

Love relationships can give us our greatest joy or our greatest pain. There isn't anything else that can give you that euphoric feeling when deep in love with another being (except for the love of ourselves). It is the one external relationship that can potentially stays with us for decades - until the day we die. They are with us for the good times and the bad times. We think it is worth nurturing it a little more 'mindfully' every day. It can only bring out the best in us by doing so.

I keep this book on my night table and randomly open it to learn a new lesson when in need - and to stay centred on love....a gentle nudge.

Heart Like a River

"If you pour a handful of salt into a cup of water, the water becomes undrinkable. But if you pour the salt into a river, people can continue to draw the water to cook, wash, and drink. The river is immense, and it has the capacity to receive, embrace, and transform. When we are small, our understanding and compassion are limited, and we suffer. We can't accept or tolerate others and their shortcomings, and we demand that they change. But when our hearts expand, these same things don't make us suffer anymore. A lot of understanding and compassion and we can embrace others. We accept others as they are, and then they have the chance to transform. So the big question is: how do we help our hearts to grow?"

Understanding is the Nature of Love

"Understanding someone's suffering is the best gift you can give another person. Understanding is love's other name. If you don't understand, you can't love."

Love is Organic

"Love is a living, breathing thing. There is no need to force it to grow in a particular direction.If we start by being easy and gentle with ourselves, we will find it is just there inside of us, solid and healing."


"Often, we get crushes on others not because we truly love and understand them, but to distract ourselves from our suffering. We also get distracted by addictions to divert our suffering. When we learn to love and understand ourselves and have true compassion for ourselves, then we can truly love and understand another person."

The Four Elements of Love 

"True love is made of four elements: loving kindness, compassion, Joy, and equanimity. If your love contains these elements, it will be healing and transforming, and it will have the element of holiness in it. True love has the power to heal and transform any situation and bring deep meaning to our lives."

Asking For Help

"When you suffer, you may want to go to your room, lock the door, and cry. The person who hurt you is the last person you want to see. Even if he tries to approach you, you may still be very angry. To get relief, you have to go to the person you love, the one who just hurt you very deeply, And ask for help. Become yourself one hundred percent. Open your mouth and say with all your heart and all your concentration that you suffer and you need help."

Three Helpful Sentences 

"It's not healthy to keep anger inside for too long. If you're too upset to speak calmly, you can write a note and put it where the other person will see it. Here are three sentences that may help. First: "My dear, I am suffering, I am angry, and I want you to know it." The second is: "I am doing my best." This means you are practicing mindful breathing and mindful walking, and you are refraining from doing doing or saying anything out of anger. The third is: "Please help me." Memorize the sentences. Or write them on a small piece of paper, the size of the credit card and put it in your wallet. Then when you're angry, you can take it out, and you will know exactly what to do."

Be well,

Kelly and Erinn


Meet Us!

What makes us roll? What makes us passionate? Entrepreneurs, best-selling authors, lovers of planet Earth and committed to inspire change in the hearts of all.



Join Kelly’s Tribe
For all things tasty and newsworthy.
Your life will never be the same.
FREE recipe, Entice people with something….